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Version 0.2 - MICROSOFT WINDOWS

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Linux is like a wigwam. No windows, no gates, apache inside!

Linux -- the Ultimate Windows Service Pack

The manual said the program requires Windows 95 or better, so I installed Linux

(The box said "Windows 95, Windows NT 4.0 or better", so i installed Linux.)

This is Linux country. On a quiet night, you can hear NT re-boot.

"Microsoft is to quality software what McDonalds is to gourmet cooking"

 

 

Hiroshima 45, Tsjernobyl 86, Windows 95

Windows 98 supports real multitasking - it can boot and crash simultaneously.

 

Your mouse has moved. Windows must be restarted. Reboot now?

[ OK ] [Reboot] [Yes]

 

``I entered the office and tossed my hat at the coat rack. It missed, hit the heater, and instantly burst into flames. That reminded me: I had some work to do in Windows.'' -- Lincoln Spector "The Maltese Penguin"

 

click to enlarge

``I hated the operating system; it was a complete and utter kludge, and the whole bloody design was just a mess. I wouldn't go anywhere near it.'' -- Sir Clive Sinclair on the IBM PC, ``Wired''

``Windows 95: from the guys who brought you EDLIN''

 

 
``Bill Gates, brilliant? Really? Uh-huh [Ellison laughs for several seconds].'' -- Oracle CEO Larry Ellison, interviewed in Forbes ASAP


Larry Ellison

 

M.C.Mar An NT server can be run by an idiot, and usually is. emsi@it.pl

People who think MSDOS & Windows are the slickest thing since sliced butter should be forced to wear a sign stating "This mind intentionally left blank";^}

This is your brain:
LILO........................
This is your brain on drugs:
Starting Windows 95 ...
Any questions?

Windows 95 isn't CrippleWare -- it's "Functionally Challenged".

"Friends don't let friends do MS-DOS"

Microsoft - because god hates us

The latest stable version of MS DOS is: MS DOS 5.0
The latest beta version of MS DOS is: Windows 98SE
The latest prepatch (alpha) version of MS DOS *appears* to be: Windows ME

About MS-DOS: "... an OS originally designed for a microprocessor that modern kitchen appliances would sneer at...." - Dave Trowbridge, _Computer Technology Review_, Aug 90

Windows 98 (win-doze): a 32 bit Extension to a 16 bit Graphical Shell of an 8 bit Operating System originally coded for a 4 bit Processor by a 2 bit company that can't stand one bit of competition.

 

"Bill Gates and Richard Stallman Meet in Airport; Thousands Killed in Resulting Explosion. News at 11."


Richard Stallman

 

Shine A Light

Q: How many Windows users does it take to change a light bulb?

A: Two. One to screw in the bulb, and another to install shine2000.exe, shine2000.sys, lightbulb2000.exe, bright2000.sys, bulb-replace.com and update the socket BIOS.

 


Thomas A. Edison

Heaven's Gates

Bill Gates went up to heaven and was met by St. John. Seeing how he was so important, St. John gave him the option to go to Heaven or to Hell. Bill Gates said, "What are they like?" St. John shows him Heaven, which is very nice with green fields and luxurious houses. Only you can't drink. Bill Gates asks to see Hell so St. John shows him and it is exactly the same except that you can drink. So Bill Gates says, "I'll go to Hell then" About a month later St. John returns to see how he is getting on and Bill Gates is working in the furnaces sweating and wishing he could drink anything let alone alcohol. He says to St. John, "Hell is nothing like what you showed me!" St. John replies, "Well, that was only the demo version"

 

Microsoft 0.1 | Microsoft 0.2 | Microsoft 0.3 | Aviation One | Aviation Two | Aviation Three
Optical Tricks | If Women Ruled The World | Superhero Personality Test | Survival Tests
Flash Games | Escape Paris Flash Game | Escape Paris Flash Game Sequel | Dress up Angelina Jolie Flash Game |
Smack the Penguin
| Dynamic Systems
Bullshit Business Terms